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Who’s the critic?

posted by:
BlondGirl

So I was talking with my best friend M the other day about confidence and acceptance.  I’ve always struggled with body image and  low self-esteem, and have had trouble accepting me for me.  I’ve always worried about how other people see me.  M and I discussed how many people, especially women, no matter how beautiful they are struggle with this.  It is absolutely crazy, it really is to worry about not being thin enough or pretty enough.  I understand this, I really do but I also see society bullying people into thinking that this is the most important part of life.  It likes the Cinderella Syndrome, if you are pretty and dress nice everything will turn out happily ever after.  That is such bull-crap.

We will always have something to critique about ourselves and others.  I am SO guilty of this, I worry about how I look so much, and will remember and obsess over one negative comment over 10 positive sweet comments.  Why?  Is there really an area of the brain that affects how you pick up on or react to other peoples emotions like the author of ‘The Female Brain’ states?  Is our confidence and or insecurity hard wired?  I don’t really believe that this is the case.  I think that we can choose how we feel.  Half the time or more that we (or I) have obsessed or worried about others, they probably have done the same about themselves.  So we are worried about looking or being foolish but no-one really cares as they are concentrating on themselves or something else.  Do you remember what your friend, coworker wore 3 days ago?  Do you even care?  Probably not but I know I’ve have had second thoughts about wearing something because I’ve worn it a few days before…. We are our own worst critic.

I’m working on accepting and appreciating myself.  I know I may not be the most beautiful woman in the world but who freaking cares.  Beauty fades, and what should matter most is how you treat yourself and others. I wish I can say with absolute sincerity that I will live the remainder of my life with only that in mind, but I know that I am not that strong….yet. Insecurity comes in all forms, but it’s how it affects us that matters.  We should spend less time worrying about what others think and more time appreciating life.  There are so many different paths in life, don’t get tangled up in the weeds.

 

I loved this article, click on the link to read it!  10 Life Lessons I Wish I Knew When I Was Younger

 

4 Responses to “Who’s the critic?”

  1. April says:

    Mary you ARE beautiful…both on the outside and on the inside but it is the inside beauty that counts. I have ALWAYS believed that my friend and will continue to believe it.

    • BlondGirl says:

      You are super sweet for saying that April! Thank you, and right back at you my friend! I miss you so much, I can’t wait to be back at work :)

  2. Sandra Spicer says:

    I completely agree and know that I have the same insecurities that you talk about. It’s so frustrating! I’m so much more forgiving about EVERYthing where others are concerned and so much harder on myself. One day at a time as they say…

    • BlondGirl says:

      I think that we are very similar! One day at a time is right, and try to remember all the good you do and how much a great friend and mom you are. You are wonderful!

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